MomMe Monday: Creative Focus

MomMe Monday: Creative Focus

By: Donna Vail

“Eternally, woman spills herself away in driblets to the thirsty, seldom being allowed the time, the quiet, the peace, to let the pitcher fill up to the brim.” -Anne Morrow Lindbergh

Are you faced with being told to be selfish while you were raised that being selfish was a sin? When we look for the exact definition of the word selfishness it reads: concern with one’s own interests. Is that a sin? Wouldn’t it be irresponsible to not look out for one’s concerns?

Research has shown that the beginnings of child abuse often are in parents who deny their own needs. When anyone denies their own needs for the fulfillment of others often the experience ends up in anger, depression and then passing this on to the children.

“A healthy family is a mutual collaboration with a commitment to the well-being of each individual, including all the women. For many women, a creative outlet while raising children protects her and her children from great unhappiness and stress. Self-fulfilled people have more positive energy available for the challenges of parenting.” -Gail McMeekin

As women we can unlock our skillful ability to balance our creative urges with our responsibilities to others. It does take skill and effort towards rethinking and reorganizing our days. We must also allow our families to grow and change with us as we awaken to our creative nurture.

Here are a few suggested areas to develop in order to combine your creative life with your responsibilities to others:

Let go of domestic perfection. Dust can wait but the children will not, and neither will your creativity. I’m not big on letting things go because I have a desire to have a clean and well-organized home but there are ways to balance without living in the extreme. Seek the help of a housekeeper or assistant even if it is just part-time. Create a plan so that the whole family is contributing to maintaining a clean and productive home. We all live, work, eat, and sleep together so it should be a joint effort to maintain the everyday needs of living.

Turn off the need to entertain. Your family does not need you to always entertain them. There is plenty of time to play and be entertained but be sure there is plenty more time for creativity. Children are quite content to have time of their own to spend on reading, painting, making things, or even just exploring what they are particularly passionate about in the moment. When your children see you creating something fabulous they will be inspired to their own creativity. By honoring yourself you are teaching them to honor themselves.

Set boundaries. Burnout is often the result of simply not saying no. As moms we have vast opportunity to participate in so much and often it is our family who receives this constant flow of service that has no hesitation with wanting more of you. Be sure and give yourself enough time at home to create. Make a schedule that balances plenty of time at home and less time out of the home.

Create solitude. Take time to be alone. This is where we connect to our inner core. Create a space by committing the time and value it. This may mean giving up other things but when you live true to your values your very personal journey fulfills you and over pours with more to give in all areas of your life. Find your space of quietude by waking early before everyone else gets the busy day started. Perhaps your husband or a family member can take the kids for a block of time. Just a simple 2-4 hours once a week can make a great difference in your creative energy.

Support and be supported. Seek out other women who support self-focus. By connecting and supporting each other you will create new freedoms and better support systems for each other. How can you help each other? Can you baby-sit for each other, attend classes together, share goals and ideas for management of creativity and responsibilities to others. Work together and empower each other.

Take some time to work into this creative space. Determine your values and create something beautiful. Remember, just because you write or paint something today doesn’t mean you have to always do the same thing. As you take action from your creative inspiration the next step will be revealed to you. Always come from a place of loving kindness, for yourself as well as others.

“You are not making the change because you are a bad person and you are doing it wrong. You make changes because you love yourself and you want to improve the quality of your life.” –Louise Hay

Think peace, live love.

© copyright 2010 Donna Vail International All rights reserved.

Want to Use This Article In Your e-zine Web site, blog or newsletter? You have my permission, as long as you include this complete excerpt with the article: Inspired Education Mentor Donna Vail publishes the all inspiring ‘Living an Inspired Education’ e-newsletter. Every issue reveals tips, tools, and secrets to simply and confidently home school with inspiration! Start living a lifestyle of true freedom and inspire the best in your child.  Get your free weekly education and success mindset tips now at

Speak Your Mind